Bone Tomahawk revives the Western movie genre

 I grew up in the golden age of Western movies. I saw dozens of Westerns as a child and watched hundreds of Western episodes on television: Gunsmoke, Bonanza, High Chapparal, Have Gun Will Travel, The Roy Rogers Show, Rawhide—I saw them all.

Why did I love this genre? The Western desert appealed to me--the beauty of a long vista, with its ever-present sense of danger and adventure. Mostly, however, I loved to see stories of good guys on horseback as they struggled against insensate evil. I knew the good guys would eventually win, and in the movies, they almost always did.

John Ford's Westerns were my favorites. Without realizing it, I was a movie critic in elementary school. I realized that The Searchers, She Wore a Yellow Ribbon, and The Man Who Shot Liberty Valence were the genuine article and far superior to the cheap imitations.

Beginning in the 1960s, the Western movie genre fell into decline. I hoped Missouri Brakes, starring Marlin Brando, and The Shootist, starring John Wayne, would revive it, but those movies were disappointments.

Eventually, I realized that Western movies set in modern times are just as thrilling as films about the Old West. Lonely Are the Brave, Hud, and No Country for Old Men were authentic contributions to my beloved genre.  Hell or High Water, starring Jeff Bridges, Ben Foster, and Chris Pine, is equal to Shane, even though the victory over evil was nuanced.

Last night, I watched Bone Tomahawk on Netflix, and I was gratified to see a Western movie that is equal to the films I saw as a kid. The plot is simple: four men of uneven temperament ride out to rescue a kidnapped damsel in distress. By the movie's end, the good guys complete their mission, but two of the four saviors are dead.

Kurt Russell plays the laconic, relentless, and totally dedicated lawman. Mathew Fox plays Brooder, the Western dandy who hates Indians. Patrick Wilson is the faithful husband who endures almost unbelievable pain and hardship to be reunited with his wife, played by Lili Simmons.

Richard Jenkins is cast in the scene-stealing role of Chicory, the self-proclaimed "backup deputy" who is simple-minded but loyal and brave. If there is a hall of fame for Western movie sidekicks, Jenkins deserves a place next to Gabby Hayes, Slim Pickens, and Andy Devine.

I always judge a Western movie's portrayal of Native Americans. Until I saw Bone Tomahawk, I gave Wes Studi top billing for his role as the malignant Magua in The Last of the Mohicans. Now, there was an Indian with a chip on his shoulders.

Wes Studi, however, is a Presbyterian compared to the aborigines in Bone Tomahawk, who are bone-chillingly scary. I won't say more because I want movie movers to feel the horror I experienced when the bad-ass Native Americans showed up in Bone Tomahawk.

Bone Tomahawk is an almost perfect Western--the old-fashioned struggle of good against evil set against the backdrop of the stark and pitiless landscape of the American West.  My faith in Westerns has been renewed,

Going after the Bad Guys

'Can’t Take the Home Out of Oklahoma': A Movie Review of Twisters

I grew up in Tornado Alley in western Oklahoma. This was before the invention of cell phones or the Internet, and people in my small town were warned about an approaching tornado by sirens. As a small child, I recall being awakened in the middle of the night by the urgent moan of a siren blasting through loudspeakers mounted on telephone poles throughout the town.

My parents didn't have a basement, so they would bundle up my siblings and me and take us next door to Mrs. Nightingale’s house. Mrs. Nightingale had a concrete root cellar filled with home-canned fruits and vegetables that smelled of musty concrete. This shelter had a sheet metal door that my father invariably left open. He would stand in the doorway of our cave-like refuge, ready to close it if we heard the freight-train sound of an approaching tornado. Fortunately, we never did.

If the tornado siren blared while I was at elementary school, Mr. Vaughn, the school principal, would order all the children to huddle in the hallway, crouch on the floor, and fold our arms above our heads. It was the same drill the school practiced for nuclear war, but for a six-year-old, a tornado was much more frightening than an atomic bomb.

Our Oklahoma sky would turn green when a tornado lurked on the plains, and the air would become still and heavy. No one can see that green sky without being frightened.

Last night, I went to the movies to see Twisters, starring Glen Powell and Daisy Edgar-Jones. I warn you that the film is a full-on rom-com, so if you are one of the millions of Americans who hate rom-coms, don’t see it. It’s also an action movie full of flying cars and trees and a lot of fun to watch while munching on a box of popcorn,

I liked Twisters, the 2024 remake, better than Twister, the 1996 original. The romance between Tyler and Kate, played by Powell and Edgar-Jones in the current film, was more believable than the rocky relationship between Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt in the 1996 version.

None of the main characters used profane language in Twisters, making it appropriate for kids to see. Glen Powell was devilishly handsome, and Edgar-Jones played a chaste and determined young storm chaser with a scientific theory for stopping the deadly tornados that terrorize the Plains states.

Twisters includes "Out of Oklahoma" on its soundtrack, a song written by Lainey Wilson. As an Oklahoman who got a degree from Harvard, this line from the lyrics rings true: "Can’t take the home out of Oklahoma, so you can’t take it out of me.”

I assure you that tornados do not occur daily in Oklahoma, even in Tornado Alley. In fact, I've never seen an active tornado. 

In Twisters, however, cyclones pop up with the regularity of a cross-town bus.  Day after day, adrenaline-charged storm chasers recklessly drove through farmers' fields,  whooping, hollering, and tearing up the landscape. 

If Glen and Daisy had driven through my father’s wheat field in a heavy-duty truck, they would have found storm chasing far less entertaining. In fact, they would discover that my father’s Browning shotgun was far more dangerous than any category-five tornado.

Tornado over Kansas, painted by John S. Curry (1929)

I ain't voting for Kamalama Ding Dong. The Democrats are contemptous of ordinary Americans

 Four years ago, the Democrats nominated Joe Biden, a demented grifter, for President and dragged him over the finish line. This summer, the Dems threw Biden under the bus and will likely nominate Kamala Harris, a race-hustling idiot, to replace Biden. 

It has long been evident that the Democratic Party's insiders despise Americans and are picking our pockets while their donors get richer by the day. The Dems don't care about having a secure border, they don't care about urban crime, and they don't care about inflation. And Kamala Harris, the presumed Democratic Party nominee, is the poster child for the Democratic Party's arrogance, its intellectual vacuity, and its racism.

I ain't voting for Kamalama Ding Dong to be our next President. I'm not willing for America to giggle its way into the future under the leadership of a goofball. What do you think will happen if President Kamala cackles at Vladimir Putin like she cackles at the American people?

The Democrats have insulted working Americans for years while pandering to racial minorities. Apparently, they think minorities and transgendered athletes form an electoral base strong enough to wreck the country. I think they are wrong.

With the exception of Jewish kapo politicians who are undermining Israel in its life-or-death struggle with Hamas, I don't think a single Jewish American will vote for the Ding Dong. 

Although it will surprise Nancy Pelosi, a great many Hispanic Americans are alarmed by illegal immigration, and most of them don't like being labeled as Latinx, a wokedom insult to the Spanish language. She'll be surprised at the number of Hispanics who will vote for Trump in November. 

How about Asian Americans, who've been discriminated against by America's elite universities, most of which are infested with so-called progressive Democrats? Many Asian Americans will abandon the lunatic Democrat Party this November.

The Dems have bleated about their commitment to preserving American democracy while they rig the election process to nominate a fool who has never won a single primary election. They're about as democratic as the Russian KGB.

I don't believe Kamala will defeat Trump in November, but I won't feel sorry for her when she loses. Harvard will probably ask her to be its next president—that's another part-time job that pays good wages.

Note: I can't take credit for inventing the term Kamalama Ding Dong. I heard a television commentator use that term, but I can't remember who it was. The word appears in a Jestwire commentary.

Why won't Kamala let us in on the joke?

Screw Flyover Country! The Dems raise campaign money in Hollywood, Cape Cod, and Martha's Vineyard

Last month, George Clooney and Julia Roberts co-hosted a Hollywood fundraiser for Joe Biden. Barack Obama was there to guide Joe Biden off the stage and to offer photo opportunities to Hollywood moguls. This star-studded event was a howling success. Biden pulled in $30 million for his reelection campaign.

Less than a month later, George Clooney wrote a New York Times op-ed essay calling for Biden to withdraw from the presidential race. 

Did anyone condemn Clooney as a huckster and a shill for Biden—who is so cognitively diminished that he can hardly walk unassisted? No. In fact, George Skelton, a columnist for the Los Angeles Times, praised Clooney to the skies and said Clooney should be the Democratic Party’s presidential candidate. Why? Because Clooney “has an easy smile that exudes sincerity and is extraordinarily telegenic.”

Last week, a herd of prominent Democrats called for Joe Biden to withdraw his presidential candidacy, and yesterday, Biden threw in the towel.

Nevertheless, Kamala Harris raised $2 million on Cape Cod for the demented grifter's reelection campaign just before he dropped out of the presidential race. Wouldn’t you like to see the list of donors? 

Soon,  David Letterman, the retired anchor of The Late Show, will co-host a Democratic fundraiser on Martha' Vineyard, which has become a modern-day Devil's Island for lunatic liberals suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome. 

With Biden out of the presidential race, all the money raised for Biden will go to Kamala Harris. Unfortunately for her, Biden spent 93 percent of the money he raised last month, which includes the $30 million George Clooney raked in for him in Los Angeles. No matter; the elites still have plenty of dough.

People living in Flyover Country will note that the coastal elites are donating money to the Democrats while food prices and rent are going through the roof. The Dems don't care about working Americans, whom they contemptuously describe as White Christian Nationalists. 

"Screw Flyover Country" is the Dems' motto. I sincerely hope Flyover Country rams Donald Trump up their butts.

David Letterman
A fool and his money are soon parted, Photo credit: Forbes.

Secret Service Director Kimberley Cheatle should be fired ASAP

A 20-year-old kid tried to kill Former President Trump last week and damned near succeeded. A bullet pierced Trump’s right ear. Had it traveled two inches to the left, Mr. Trump would have been a murder victim.

Shortly after the assassination attempt, Secret Service Director Kimberly Cheatle sent a memo to her agents, praising their work and urging them not to be distracted “by those who were not there and yet still pass judgment.”

What a churlish thing to write. Basically, Ms. Cheatle labeled any critic of the Secret Service for the way it handled the assassination attempt as a Monday morning quarterback.

Later, Cheatle admitted some "failures" in the security arrangements at the Trump rally. Nevertheless, she refused to assign blame or resign from her post.

In fact, the Secret Service’s security arrangements for President Trump were shockingly inadequate. Several commentators have pointed out that Trump's security team should never have allowed a man with a rifle to crawl up on the roof of a building and shoot at the President from a distance of only 140 yards.

I live in Mississippi, where young people begin hunting deer at the age of 12. Anyone who is moderately proficient with a deer rifle will tell you that a standing target only 140 yards away is an easy shot—a can’t-miss shot--especially if the shooter is aided by a rangefinder to help calculate a bullet's trajectory.

I can think of only two explanations for the Secret Service’s failure to secure the building from which the would-be assassin fired his rifle. The agent in charge may have been incompetent. Alternatively, the Secret Service agents may have been indifferent to Trump's safety.

After all, Ms. Cheetle was appointed by President Biden. Perhaps she didn’t think it was important to protect President Trump. If so, Cheatle's attitude toward Trump may have infected her agents.

Regardless of whether the assassination attempt in Butler, Pennsylvania, can be explained by incompetence or malice, the people responsible should be fired. Kimberly Cheatle should surrender her office keys and be escorted out of the building carrying a cardboard box containing her personal effects.

No one should feel sorry for Kimberly Cheatle. She has a sociology degree from Eastern Illinois University, which should make her eminently employable. Perhaps she can get her old job back guarding potato chips at Pepsico. I'm sure Jill Biden will write a strong letter of recommendation.

Barney Fife: Don't put him on a sloped roof.

The Fat Lady has sung but Biden won't drop out of the presidential race until he pardons his family

The Fat Lady has sung. Biden will not be on the Democratic presidential ticket in November. George Clooney, Hollywood's operatic Fat Lady, wrote a New York Times essay declaring that the Democrats need a new candidate. Biden can say bye-bye to any more mega donations from the entertainment industry.

When will the tottering geezer toddle off the stage to spend his last golden years at Reheymouh Beach?

It's a certainty that Biden won't step down before his term ends. Although he vows he won't pardon his son Hunter (convicted of federal gun violations), I think Joe will pardon him, along with other family members and a large cast of friends who were allegedly involved in an influence-peddling scam. 

When he issues those pardons, Biden will be implicitly admitting that he was part of an illegal scheme to squeeze money out of foreign governments or their proxies. The American public will be outraged at the Democrats, so Biden can't release those pardons until after the November election.

Nor will Biden release his delegates anytime soon. Per his handlers' instructions, he won't withdraw from the presidential race until it is too late for the Democrats to substitute any candidate except Kamala Harris.

The Democrats have carefully organized this King Lear drama, and all the essential characters are sticking to the script. I suspect Joe and Jill are in on the gag and playing along until Joe can issue a pile of pardons. 

Spoiler alert. When this histrionic psychodrama is over, and Americans stumble out of the movie theater into the blinding sunlight, they will discover they have a new president--Kamala Harris.

George Clooney stars as the Singing Fat Lady.

Joe Biden should pardon Rachel Maddow on humanitarian grounds

You can take it to the bank. Joe Biden will drop out of the 2024 presidential race. The New York Times editorial calling for Joe to step aside was the death knell for his reelection campaign, and everybody knows it.

Why doesn't Joe withdraw his candidacy to preserve his dignity and enjoy his golden years eating ice cream and clam strips at Rehoboth Beach? 

I'll tell you why. Family and friends in the Biden bunker fear what will happen to them if Dr. Dementus gets hold of the Justice Department. Trump might launch criminal investigations against the Lawfare crowd and Joe's relatives--the ones who reportedly have offshore banking accounts. Therefore, some of Biden's closest family members and advisers are urging him to hang on.

I think Biden's confidants would drop their efforts to keep Biden in the White House if Joe would issue blanket pardons to everybody who was complicit in Russiagate, the Hunter Laptop scandal, and the alleged Biden influence-peddling scam.

Obviously, Joe needs to pardon family members first. Jill, Hunter, Joe's children, and grandchildren should receive blanket pardons whether or not they did anything unlawful.

Then there are the lawyers who set up the Biden family's alleged money laundering scheme. They will want pardons. And Joe should pardon all those lawfare attorneys—Fani Willis, Alvin Bragg, Jack Smith, and others. 

On humanitarian grounds, Biden should also pardon all the people who are hysterical about the possibility of Trump becoming president again. They fear mass deportations, detention camps, paramilitary groups, death squads, and draconian restrictions on abortion.

Therefore, Biden should issue sweeping pardons to all of Trump's most vicious critics, including the ladies on "The View" and all the MSNBC commentators. I don't think any of these people did anything illegal. Still, a Biden Get-Out-Of-Jail card would ease their anxieties about possibly being sent to a concentration camp in rural Arkansas where they might be forced to pluck chickens.

Some of Trump's most paranoid fault finders may fear that a Biden pardon letter might get lost or misplaced when they need it most. For example, an MSNBC reporter might get arrested while her pardon letter was being laminated at Kinko's.

To alleviate this fear, Biden should offer to tattoo his pardon letter on the recipients' butts. 

Rachel Maddow is excessively worried about what might happen to her if Trump regains the White House. However, even Rachel would probably sleep better at night if she had a sweeping and all-encompassing presidential pardon tattooed for posterity on her rump.

What can Biden do to ease Rachel's anxiety about Donald Trump?