More Biden pardons may be coming. Don't be afraid to ask for one.

 Many progressive Democrats recoiled in horror when President Biden pardoned his son Hunter for every crime he might have committed going back to 2014. Old Joe took a lot of heat from the legacy media for breaking his promise not to let Hunter off the hook for his various high jinks, but Whoopie Goldberg of  The View stood by him--which is what's important.

In fact, the Hunter-pardon caper went so well that Biden staffers are thinking about getting the President to issue preemptive pardons to other Biden cronies to protect them from President Trump's vengeance. Biden's people floated the names of three people who might need pardons for the things they did to thwart Trump's agenda: Liz Cheney. Anthony Fauci, and Senator-elect Adam Schiff.

I have two problems with this notion.  First, pardoning someone for misdeeds because they might be vigorously prosecuted reminds me of the proverbial man who killed his parents and then begged the court for mercy because he's an orphan. 

Second, I don't think Biden has the power to pardon people for theoretical crimes for which they haven't been charged or convicted. It is true, for example, that Liz Cheney is an asshole, but that's not a federal crime for which she can be prosecuted.

I don't think Biden will issue preemptive pardons to political figures who haven't been charged with a crime. Doing so would only embarrass the people who receive such pardons, and accepting a blanket pardon would be an implicit admission of criminal wrongdoing.

On the other hand, I believe President Biden will seriously consider pardoning family members who have been credibly accused of profiting from a money laundering and influence-peddling scheme while Joe was serving as Vice President. If proven, these accusations could lead to serious jail time.

However, pardoning the Biden clan for unspecified hypothetical crimes would be risky. Millions of people would wonder why Doctor Jill and Joe's brother James need a pardon, which might prompt honest district attorneys to investigate.

Long Live the Gingerbread People!

 Unless you've been living under a rock, you know that Trader Joe's grocery stores sell all kinds of delectable snack foods. 

Yesterday, I returned from Trader Joe's with a box of gingerbread cookies. The box's cellophane window revealed traditional little gingerbread figures—just like the gingerbread men I devoured as a kid.

As I tore into the contents, I was pleased to see that the box was labeled "Mini Gingerbread People," not "Mini Gingerbread Men." That's good, I thought to myself. Trader Joe's is woke and fully invested in Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion.

However, as I bit into my first cookie,  I was horrified to see that all the little gingerbread figures were covered with white icing. I could discern no Latinex gingerbread people, no BIPOC people, no cookies that represented the LGBTQX community.

Indeed, as I spread the confections on a plate, I realized I was looking at a pile of cleverly disguised cis-gendered, white Christian nationalist cookie men. I spat out this despicable little symbol of racism, sexism, and homophobia. I immediately took my box of gingerbread people back to my local Trader Joe's store and demanded a full refund.

Not surprisingly, the store manager profusely apologized and assured me that all boxes of gingerbread people were being recalled nationwide and would be off Trader Joe's shelves by sundown.

Whew! That was close. Now, I can devote all my time to persuading the municipal road maintenance department to change the name of manholes to person holes, maintenance holes, or inspection chambers.

Racism, misogyny, and homophobia have contaminated America's food supplies.

President Biden pardons Hunter. What about Jill?

 The legacy media, in a frenzy of mendacity and hypocrisy, claims to be disappointed by President Biden's pardon of his son Hunter. After all, old Joe said repeatedly that he wouldn't give his wayward child a get-out-jail-free card.

"We haven't seen a pardon this sweeping as Hunter Biden's in generations," Politico said in a breathless headline. Moreover, Politico pointed out, "The starting date of Jan. 1, 2014, in the Biden pardon was surely not chosen randomly." 

Indeed, the date was undoubtedly chosen to cover Hunter's time on the board of Burisma Holdings. Burisma, you may recall, is the Ukrainian gas company that lavishly paid Hunter while his dad was Vice President.

A New York Times story, in a touching display of naivety, reported that Joe Biden changed his mind about pardoning his crack-sniffing offspring based partly on the fear that President Trump would wreak vengeance on his beloved son. The Times journalists overlooked the far more plausible explanation for Joe Biden's flip-flop-- that our gasbag president was simply lying. 

Other outlets worried that the Hunter pardon would tarnish Joe's presidential legacy, which is laughable. What legacy? 

Joe was cognitively diminished the day he took office. His extravagant spending triggered rampant inflation. His bumbling machinations in Ukraine damn near started a nuclear war with Russia, and his administration's retreat from Afghanistan was a disaster. 

Joe Biden's legacy is simply this: He was a demented grifter who significantly reduced our nation's standing as the leader of the Free World. I'm sure the curators at the Biden Presidential Library will explain all this with instructive dioramas and pre-recorded lectures.

I predict that Joe Biden isn't through issuing pardons. Several friends and family members have been credibly accused of participating in an influence-peddling and money-laundering scheme. Surely, he will pardon Dr. Jill and his brother James.

When Biden issues more pardons to his cronies, his media fans will be further dismayed.  However, the legacy media will melt down into apoplectic rage when President Trump pardons all the January 6th protesters, which Trump has promised to do. 

That day is coming. When those pardons are issued, I'll enjoy reading what the New York Times, the Washington Post, and Politico will say about Trump's merciful gesture--not to mention the wizened sages on The View.

The Times is shocked, shocked, about the Hunter pardon.
Photo credit: Judicial Watch and Politico

Moving the Nation's Capital Out of the District of Columbia. An Idea Whose Time Has Come?

People's Republic, Kurt Schlichter's post-apocalyptic novel, posits a breakdown of the American Republic as the Blue States collapse under the weight of woke politics and break off into a separate country.

 Schlichter labels the new nation-state the People's Republic of North America, which he envisions as being georaphically divided. The western segment is comprised of California, Oregon, and Washington. The eastern portion encompasses the East Coast states stretching from Maine to northern Virginia and the Rust Belt states of the upper Midwest.

Sandwiched between these breakaway regions, the old United States of America is now reduced to the Southern states, the Plains states, and the Rocky Mountains West. The new capital city is Dallas.

I thought about Schlichter's novel as I pondered President Trump's proposal to close the FBI headquarters in Washington, D.C., and move the agents out into the real world, where they could revive the FBI's original mission of arresting the bad guys.

Why the hell not? It makes sense to separate our nation's premier law enforcement agency from the bureaucratic morass in the District of Columbia, where the FBI morphed itself from a crime-fighting agency into stormtroopers for the Democratic Party.

Nevertheless, the FBI will need a new headquarters. I suggest Dallas as the location of the new FBI central office. 

Dallas is a sober, common-sense city where citizens are discouraged from defecating on the sidewalks. Unlike Minneapolis, where disgruntled dwellers are free to burn the town down, or Los Angeles, where shoplifting has become a competitive sport with varsity and JV divisions, most Dallasites obey the law. Doesn't it make sense for the FBI headquarters to be in a law-abiding town?

Indeed, Trump should pursue a broader vision than simply relocating the FBI. Why not move the entire capital from the District of Columbia to a new location as yet unsullied by corruption, incompetence, and venality? 

Let's move all the federal bureaucrats to a new capital in Dallas, Omaha, Pocatello, Bakersfield, or perhaps Fargo, North Dakota. 

Such a move would force our bigoted and provincial coastal elites to stop referring to America's Heartland as Flyover Country. More importantly, it would give the denizens of the Deep State an opportunity to fumigate the pesthole on the Potomac where our nation's capital now resides.

Land Mines, Cluster Bombs, and a Partridge in a Pear Tree. All I Want For Christmas is No World War III

Insanity, a sage once said,  "is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result."

Under that definition, President Biden's Ukraine war strategy is insane. This war has dragged on for almost three years, and the carnage only intensifies.

 Ukrainian president Zelensky periodically asks Biden for more sophisticated weapons; Biden hesitates briefly and then gives Zelensky whatever the little guy wants.

Biden has become a short-order cook for the Ukrainians. Abrams tanks, F-16s, cluster bombs, long-range missiles, and land mines: "Coming right up!"

Biden apparently believes that Russian casualties will eventually force Russian President Vladimir Putin to sue for peace. Indeed, the pile of dead and wounded grows bigger by the day. 

Nevertheless, American weapons and technology haven't hastened an end to the war. In fact, the scope of the war is expanding. North Korean troops are fighting alongside the Russians in the Kursk region. China buys Russian oil to finance Putin's war and may have committed acts of sabotage on behalf of Russia in the Baltic Sea. Iran supplies Russia with drones. 

America and Great Britain have given Zelensky everything he asks for, including permission to fire US and British-made long-range missiles into Russia. President Biden will soon be sending ant-personnel mines to the Zelensky regime--an additional escalation.

In short, the US and its allies are doing the same thing over and over by supplying Ukraine with evermore lethal weaponry, and they keep getting the same result--an increasingly aggressive Russian assault. 

Jamie Dimon, Chase CEO, is correct: World War III has already started. President Trump has promised to bring the Ukraine war to a swift conclusion. Let's hope and pray that Biden doesn't drag our nation into a global nuclear conflict before Trump is sworn into office.

How I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb.

Will Biden start World War Three? Or Has It Already Begun?

To be fair, Oprah Winfrey warned us. If Kamala Harris loses the presidential election, she said, "it is entirely possible that we will not have the opportunity to ever cast a ballot again."

Like millions of Americans, I misinterpreted Oprah's dire prediction. I thought she was saying that if Trump is elected President, he will destroy American democracy.

Now, I think Oprah may have been warning us that if the Democrats lose to Trump, President Biden will start World War III.

That certainly looks like what Biden is trying to do by unleashing the Ukrainians to fire American-made long-range missiles into Russia. President Vladimir Putin has repeatedly warned that he might launch a nuclear response if Ukraine attacks the Russian Motherland with US or NATO missiles.

Indeed, Jamie Dimon, CEO of Chase Bank, said last month that "World War III has already begun."

Dimon pointed out that we "already have battles on the ground being coordinated in multiple countries." The North Koreans have joined Russia in fighting Ukraine, and Iran is making drones for the Russians. It seems increasingly likely that Belarus will get sucked into the maelstrom of global war.

What the hell are we doing? Why isn't Vice President Kamala Harris invoking the 25th Amendment to wrest control of the government from Biden, who is in severe cognitive decline? Why hasn't Congress begun impeachment proceedings to stop Biden from escalating the Ukrainian conflict?

It's time to take old Joe's car keys and return him to Delaware. And let's find out who in our government goaded Biden into stupidly escalating this senseless war. Those individuals need to be sent back to Martha's Vineyard.

World War III may be coming to your neighborhood
Photo credit: NY Times

Biden Okays Long-Range Missile Strikes Into Russia. It's Time to Invoke the 25th Amendment

 Russia's war with Ukraine has slogged along for more than a thousand days--longer than the Nazi siege of Leningrad during World War II.  Russia suffered approximately 1.5 million casualties during the Leningrad battle, including about a million people who died of starvation. 

How many people have died so far in the Ukraine war? No one can say for sure because everyone is lying, but a fair estimate is one million dead or wounded. In addition,  the war has displaced about one-third of Ukraine's civilian population.

This is Joe Biden's war; he has sent enough weapons and ammunition to keep it crackling merrily for nearly three years. Ukraine's President Zelensky—the little guy who wears pajamas when he speaks before Congress—claims his country can defeat the Russians if the U.S. supplies it with high-tech weapons, and Biden has obliged.

So far, our government has given Zelensky Abrams tanks, Bradley Fighting Vehicles, cluster bombs, Uranium-tip missiles, Javelin missile systems, and F-16 fighter jets. 

Yet the Russians keep pushing, and North Korea recently joined the fight.

 Everyone knows the Ukrainians can't defeat Russia and that peace can only be achieved through territorial concessions. Does anyone believe the Zelensky regime will reclaim Crimea or the Donbas?

Now Biden's demented days are numbered. Donald Trump will take office in January, and he has promised to bring the Ukraine war to an end. 

So, what does Biden do during the waning days of his administration? He gives Ukraine permission to strike Russia with US-made long-range missiles. 

Vladimir Putin has warned that this escalation could trigger a nuclear war, but apparently, no one in the Biden administration believes him.

In my view, Biden's decision to allow Ukraine to launch long-range American missiles into Russia is insane. The doddering fool only has about 60 more days in office. That's plenty of time to impeach him or invoke the 25th Amendment.

Photo credit: The Economist

Unemployed Lawfaw Attorneys To Staff New Alaska Law School. Letitia James to be VP for DEI?

Paul Krugman, Nobel Prize-winning economist, warned that Donald Trump's victory over Kamala Harris could trigger "economic chaos."

In particular, Trump's election severely shocked the legal industry as hundreds of Lawfare attorneys lost their jobs. Speaking anonymously because of the topic's sensitivity,  one economist estimates that Lawfare generated a substantial percentage of the nation's GNP last year because thousands of Ivy League attorneys were suing or prosecuting Donald Trump.

 "Donald Trump's election throws all those lawyers out of work," the economist apprised. "Also, high-end restaurants in New York and Washington DC will likely lose a quarter of their business."

 Jack Smith, who was prosecuting Trump in the District of Columbia, will probably quit before Trump fires him. The House Judiciary Committee accused Alvin Bragg of violating Trump's constitutional rights. Marc Elias, an expert in political campaign law, is reportedly devastated by the election outcome. Friends say Elias may be forced to euthanize Bode, his Portuguese Water Dog because Elias can no longer afford to feed his beloved pet.

Fortunately, Trump appointed me to his Executive Transition Team and charged me with designing a plan to minimize the economic disruption to the Lawfare industry. Here's my proposal.

Early next year, the federal government will create a new law school in Alaska, the only state without one. The new school will be located on the lovely Aleutian island of Adak, about 4500 miles from the nation's capital.

Out-of-work Lawfare lawyers will find the Adak climate agreeable.  The island seldom experiences freezing weather, and summer temperatures range as high as 51 degrees Fahrenheit in August.

In addition, Adak has a good transportation infrastructure. It offers once-a-week air service to the nearby island of Shemya and connecting flights to Vladivostok.

I will offer all unemployed Lawfare attorneys a tenured professor's position at the Adak School of Law. I've already contacted Jack Smith and offered him the Dean's position. I'm hoping Letitia James will agree to be the Vice President for Diversity, Equity and Bullshit Litigation. 

Under my proposed plan, I'll advise Trump to grant amnesty to every Lawfare lawyer who agrees to join the faculty at the Adak Law School. As for the attorneys who refuse, I think Trump should report them to the various bar associations for abusing the justice system to further political agendas.

The proposed site for  Adak Law School

Post-Election Violence in Baton Rouge? Should You Buy a Shotgun and a Case of Spam?

I received a message on my Nextdoor app inquiring about the possibility of post-election violence in Baton Rouge. "Does anyone know if there are safety precautions in place in case of a riot after the election?" the writer asked. "I don't anticipate a riot, but I keep hearing things that 'may' happen."

The writer's post indicated she (or he) lived in the Riverbend neighborhood, an affluent suburb located near LSU in the Mississippi River floodplain. I can't image election-triggered violence in Riverbend's quiet, leafy streets, and I initially thought the messenger intended to be humorous.

I was tempted to respond that the writer should drive to Academy Sporting Goods without delay and purchase a home-defense shotgun and 200 rounds of buckshot. Then, I would continue, she should make her way to Costco and buy a case of Spam, a fire extinguisher, and at least four bottles of Makers Mark whisky—enough alcohol to make it through a couple of weeks of arson and rioting.

On reflection, however, I concluded that the messager was serious; she really wanted to know if municipal authorities were taking precautions in case Baton Rouge is engulfed by post-election rage.

So, here is my serious response. Baton Rouge has experienced some tense times recently with remarkable calm and civic dignity. The George Floyd killing sparked large-scale riots in several American cities, but not in Baton Rouge. The city's mayor and police chief responded calmly and sympathetically to race-charged events, and no one rioted.

Baton Rouge residents have legitimate things to worry about. The skyrocketing cost of property insurance may soon force people on fixed incomes out of their homes—particularly in flood-prone neighborhoods. Coastal erosion and environmental hazards are ongoing problems that Louisianians can't seem to solve, and our educational system has flaws everyone recognizes.

However, Baton Rouge residents will not riot due to the outcome of the presidential election. After all, this is a city of decent people with proper regard for law and order, for which we should all be grateful.

Not in Baton Rouge

Trump and Kamala Are Afflicted by Severe Communication Disorders

Our nation's presidential election is only a few days away, and Americans have concluded that both presidential candidates are afflicted with severe communication disorders. I'm not talking about foot-in-mouth disease. I'm talking about a profound inability to speak clearly.

Kamala Harris can't elucidate a clear, declarative sentence. She can't do it. Thus, she relies on teleprompters to give the deceptive impression that she knows what the hell she's talking about.

Her communication disorder is compounded by her compulsive urge to cackle when a reporter asks her a difficult question.

Trump speaks too long at public gatherings, tells bombastic tall tales, and gratuitously insults his political enemies if he thinks he can get a laugh.

Let's discuss Kamala first. She's actually bilingual.

Her mother tongue is woke-speak, a language that emerged from academia, where thousands of professors spend their lives conversing in an intentionally meaningless dialect. She also speaks standard English at a primitive level. She can make a bartender understand that she wants a glass of chardonnay, but she can't discuss foreign policy without lapsing into woke-speech.

Trump's disorder involves a disturbing tendency to express himself so poorly that the left-wing press can maliciously interpret his speech as racist, fascist, or even Hitlerian.

For instance, Trump intended for his astonishingly inappropriate criticism of Liz Cheney to make the reasonable observation that militaristic public leaders promote war because they themselves are not in harm's way. Unfortunately, he expressed himself in such a way that his adversaries claimed he was calling for Cheney's assassination.

Here's my take on the two candidates' linguistic disorders. Kamala speaks the way she does because she's unintelligent and has bullshitted her way through life, speaking gibberish (word salads). 

Trump's inability to speak succinctly, civilly, and prudently confounds me. I can't understand why he doesn't choose his words in such a way so as not to invite his enemies to take cheap shots at him.

If Kamala loses the election, I predict she will become president of Harvard University, where everybody converses in woke-speech and no one feels obligated to do useful work.

If Trump loses, he'll have to go into exile if the Supreme Court doesn't shut down the lawfare litigation against him. Ivy League attorneys, like Javert, the fanatical police inspector in Les Miserables, will not rest until they put Mr. Trump in prison. 

This malicious prosecution can only end in two ways. Trump will go to jail, or the lawyers who persecute him will be disbarred for abusing the law.

Me no speakee English

Mamas, Don't Let Your Cowboys Grow Up to be Babies: Willie Nelson Performs at a Kamala Harris Rally

 Kamala Harris held a rally in Houston over the weekend. Someone in the Harris camp promised an appearance by Beyonce, and thousands of Beyonce fans showed up in anticipation of a musical performance.

Beyonce did indeed appear briefly, but she didn't sing. Instead, the crowd heard Willie Nelson, the legendary country singer. Same difference, right?

Apparently not. Feeling victimized by a bait-and-switch, thousands of rally attendees booed Kamala when she appeared on stage to diffuse her politics of joy.

I love Willie Nelson. I am the last living fan to have attended his first 4th of July music festival in Dripping Springs, Texas, in 1973. I wore the grooves off my antique vinyl record of "The Red Headed Stranger" album. 

I sympathize with the Kamala supporters who were angered by the Beyonce debacle. If I had shown up to attend a Kamala rally expecting to hear Willie Nelson's golden voice, I would have been miffed to be treated to Beyonce instead. 

Nevertheless, what makes Kamala Harris think she can win votes by snagging celebrity endorsements? Who gives a shit about George Clooney's political stance, or an endorsement by Beyonce, Bruce Springsteen, or Julia Roberts? 

I'm casting my presidential vote based on global events. Which presidential candidate will help bring the Ukraine war to a close so my grandkids don't get drafted to fight in Eastern Europe? Which candidate will honor our nation's commitment to guarantee Israel's right to exist?

In these volatile times, when the world is on fire, Americans who cast their vote for Kamala Harris because a celebrity endorsed her are behaving like infants.

Let's grow up to be babies. Photo credit: Amazon.com

Wild Pigs Divert My Attention from LSU's Disastrous Loss to Texas A&M

It’s Saturday evening at Lake Mary, Mississippi, and my family has congregated around our big-screen TV to watch LSU play Texas A&M in College Station. It’s a big game: LSU is ranked Number 8 in the national polls, and the Aggies are rated Number 14. Neither team has lost a Southeast Conference game.

I am filled with a sense of well-being. Loved ones are gathered around me. Cold beer is in the refrigerator, and we have plenty of game-time snacks. I adjust my Lazy Boy recliner to a comfortable semi-prone position.

All goes well in the first half, and LSU shows good prospects of beating the insufferable Aggies. Then, my team falls apart. Three interceptions and three missed field goals attest to a Tiger meltdown. I prepare myself for a major case of the weekend blues. We’re running out of beer.

Then providence intervenes. The game camera affixed to a pecan tree alerts us to two feral hogs rooting about in our three-acre front yard. All distress about the ballgame vanishes, and two family members break out their rifles from our gun safe. Armed with a 30.06 and a 30-30, they creep down to my home’s ground level and start shooting.

Both pigs squeal and head for the brush. The smaller hog is mortally wounded but manages to travel about 50 yards before succumbing to her wounds. Two generations of family members with flashlights follow the blood trail and find the interloper. She is stone dead.

What to do with a dead feral hog? Family members truss it up to one of the steel girders that keep our living quarters above the annual spring flood waters. Then they field dress the pig, dividing it into hams, ribs, pork shoulders, and backstrap. 

The hog slayers ice down the meat in a large ice chest and call it a night. We learn that LSU lost to A &M by a score of 38-23, but nobody cares.

The next morning, I propose we take all the hog meat to a nearby game processing plant and turn it into pork chops, sausage, and dinner-size pork loins. I offer to foot the bill.

We vote, and everyone except me opts to process the hog on our kitchen counter. By two in the afternoon, our feral hog is parceled and tucked away in the freezer--about a hundred pounds of meat.

Feral hogs are a major nuisance in the rural South, where they tear up the landscape and destroy crops. People are allowed to hunt them year-around by day or night. 

Everyone I know who has eaten wild-pig meat tells me that the small porkers are delicious. Thus, I ended my weekend feeling good about my family's contribution to feral hog control. And I'm looking forward to eating a pig harvested in my own front yard.

Who cares who won the LSU-Texas A&M game?

Pay no attention to the North Koreans behind the curtain

 Ukraine’s war with Russia is nearing its third anniversary. So far, things have gone swimmingly. As one US Senator boasted, the United States has hired the Ukrainians to kill Russians and we don’t have to get our hands dirty. What’s not to like?

Everyone is lying about how many people have been killed, but some experts estimate the Russians have suffered half a million  casualties--both killed and wounded. Who knows how many Ukrainians have died, but surely the Russians are as efficient in the killing fields as the Ukrainians. It’s a fair estimate to say that one million people have been killed or maimed in this needless war, and at least 6 million Eastern Europeans are refugees.

I confess that I never learned to hate the Russians. Even as a child, when my second-grade teacher ordered me and my classmates to crawl under our desks for our periodic nuclear war drill, I couldn’t work up any animosity toward the Slavs.

My seven-year-old mind told me that the grown-ups had fucked things up somehow, and I figured some really smart person would get everything straightened out before I had to register for the draft. 

Indeed, the Cold War between the US and the Soviet Union ended in 1991, and the Commies took President Reagan's advice and tore down the Berlin wall.

For a while, East-West relations improved, and some people envisioned a day when the old Soviet regime would join the global economy and embrace western values. Ukraine and other Soviet republics declared their independence, and a brighter world seemed just around the corner.

Then, in 2014, the Ukrainians elected a pro-Russian president, and the CIA engineered a tin-pot uprising that forced the poor schumk into exile.

The Russians, understandably alarmed, reclaimed Crimea as part of the Russian motherland partly because it had an important naval base in the Crimean city of Sevastopol. Most Crimeans were okay with that because they overwhelming voted to rejoin Russia.

Meanwhile, separatists in Eastern Ukraine fought a smoldering war for independence, and the US and the Ukrainian government became cozy friends.

Then, Russia invaded Ukraine in February 2022 and the Ukrainians beat them off with Western weaponry, notably the Javelin missile systems.

Since then, the US and the NATO countries have showered Ukraine with advanced killing machines--Abrams and Leopard tanks, Bradley Fighting vehicles, F-16 jets and anti-ship missiles.

In response, Russia strengthened its ties with China, Iran, and North Korea, and North Korean troops will soon be fighting the Ukrainians.

Russia has repeatedly threatened to escalate the Ukrainian conflict into a nuclear war, but Americans are not worried. In fact, we think our demented president and idiot vice president are doing a great job managing our international affairs.

What's the long game? Ukraine and its allies could recognize Russia's claims to the Donbas and Crimea and promise not to allow Ukraine to join NATO. That action would bring the war to an end.

Alternatively, we can allow this war to drag on at the expense of another million casualties until Ukraine's cities and infrastructure are pounded into rubble.

 Then we could dust off America's strategy in Vietnam and Afghanistan and simply declare victory and go home--perhaps leaving our tanks and armored vehicles on the Ukrainian steppes as a farewell gift to Ukrainian Presidents Zelensky and Putin.

Meanwhile, our government is distracting the donkey-brained American people with histrionic claims that Donald Trump is a fascist. We'll see how things work out.

Join he North Korean Army and see the world.

Progressive Democrats Despise Rural America and Don't Care Who Knows It

Kamala Harris's frenzied minions hate rural America and have written it off in their frantic campaign to put their addled candidate into the White House. In their fevered minds, the battle for control of America's soul is not a conflict between blue states and red streets; it's a war between Democratically run cities and the rural and small-town heartland.

It is true that the Dems tried to sell Tim Walz, Kamala's running mate, as a common-sense Midwesterner, but the hayseeds smoked him out as a buffoon who can't load a shotgun. They derisively mock him as "TamponTim," a moniker that may or may not be fair.

The progressive Dems showed their hand years ago when Obama referred to rural Americans as bitter rubes clinging to their religion and their guns, and Hillary referred to them sneeringly as "a basket of deplorables." 

Indeed, today's Democratic party bosses are much like the Russian Bolsheviks, whose idea of ideal proletarians were urban factory workers too dumb to realize they were being manipulated by their Communist overseers.

Robert Conquest, in his study of the Bolsheviks' ruthless suppression of the Russian peasants, wrote that Stalin considered the peasants to be mere "scum" and that Marx compared them to "a sack of potatoes."

The Soviet apparatchiks in Moscow simply could not understand the Russian peasantry--people who lived close to the land, dwelled in small, close-knit villages, and had a mystical devotion to their religion and Mother Russia. 

 

Thus, Stalin falsely defined the Russian kulaks as anti-revolutionary capitalists and deliberately starved millions of them to death. In Stalin's mind, Russian peasants were a basket of deplorables who should be wiped from the face of the earth.  One might say the Russian peasants were getting in the way of Stalin's politics of joy.

 In two weeks, the election will be over, and America will either return to sanity or the nation will descend into the mind-fuckery that brought the nation transgender school sports and Venezuelan drug gangs. 

 
If Americans are stupid enough to elect Kamala as president, then America is done. We will no longer be the land of the free and the home of the brave. 

If Kamala is sworn in as our nation's commander and chief, in my view, rural and small-town America will become more of a backwater than it already is--a land of rising mortality rates, drug dependecy, joblessness, and suicide.

But who cares? Kamala's fawning press corps refers to the people in the Heartland as "white Christian nationists, which, of course is a code word for fascists.

I'll have a word salad to go and a basket of deplorable fries..

Lazy College Professors are Voting for Lazy Kamala Harris

 "Kamala Harris," James Howard Kunstler pithily observed,  "was just pulled out of a hat, like a rabbit. And everybody involved knew she was a dud, a slow learner, inattentive, not well-educated, lazy, possibly high a lot of the time, self-medicating due to anxiety, insecurity, purposelessness."

Yet college professors overwhelmingly support Kamala Harris over Donald Trump for the presidency. According to an Inside Higher Education poll, 78 percent of college professors plan to vote for Harris on November 5th, while only 8 percent said they will vote for Trump. 

Why? Because a high percentage of college faculty members—like Kamala Harris—are lazy. 

Professors feel a kinship with Harris. Like Kamala, most professors speak gobbledegook, a lazy mode of speech, and they find the Vice President's incoherent word salads strangely comforting.

President Biden appointed Kamala as the border czar, but she was too lazy to act on the nation's southern border crisis. Her sloth reassures professors because many aren't doing any practical work themselves.

On college campuses across America, rigor and discipline have collapsed. Grade inflation is rampant because professors are lazy. It's too damn hard for an instructor to distinguish between an A exam paper and a B. It's easier to give every student an A grade. Even at Harvard, the nation’s most elite university, 80 percent of undergraduate students have an A- grade average.

Academic assessment in graduate programs is almost nonexistent. Most graduate students get A or B grades, and plagiarism is no longer a serious academic offense. Professors are too lazy to uphold academic standards.

Again, Harvard is an example. Harvard president Claudine Gay was accused of plagiarizing passages in her dissertation and three academic articles. Harvard investigated these allegations and cleared her of any intentional wrongdoing. After all, plagiarism is no longer an act of academic dishonesty. It's merely a sign of laziness, and laziness is not a sin in the culture of American higher education.

We should not be surprised to learn that lazy college professors support Kamala Harris, a lazy vice president who wants to become our lazy president.

Kamala wants to be president. How hard can the job be?

Guns are banned at the Texas State Fair. Thank God!

Texans can legally carry handguns, but some Texas venues still ban them. The Texas State Fair, which hosts millions of visitors every year, doesn’t allow people to bring firearms onto the fairgrounds.
Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton tried overturning that ban, but the Texas Supreme Court upheld it. Thank God!

Many years ago, when I lived in Dallas, I had an unpleasant encounter at the Texas State Fair. I was standing in line to make a purchase (perhaps a Fletcher's Corny Dog), and a young Mexican woman was before me. She was accompanied by a small child. I think she was an immigrant because she didn't speak English.

Three men in line made racist remarks about her, calling her a wetback and making other derogatory comments.

I came to the woman’s defense, and soon, I was in a shouting match with these three bigots. All three men began hurling abuse at me. I remember they repeatedly called me a homosexual. In addition to being racists, they were homophobes.  Calling me gay was the worst thing they could think of to demean me.

I admit that my responses were no more appropriate. I began calling them white trash— the worst thing I could think of. I may have called them redneck white trash, which would’ve been gratuitously redundant.

I finally walked away and realized I had made a severe mistake by coming to the Hispanic women’s defense. I had triggered a confrontation that frightened her. She would’ve been better off had I said nothing.

Here’s my point. If my three antagonists had been armed, I think one of them would’ve shot me. And if I had been carrying a gun, I might have shot one of them--maybe all of them.

Americans have a Second Amendment right to own weapons, and several states allow people to carry concealed handguns, and even to wear them openly.

Mark Twain observed that the Constitution guarantees people the right to free speech, but most people have the good sense not to use it.

I feel the same way about handguns. In many states, people have a legal right to carry a pistol. Thank God, most citizens have the good sense not to avail themselves of it.

Urban crime is on the rise. Except for wealthy people who are protected by private security, everyone knows this is true. The day may come when it will make sense for law-abiding people to carry handguns, but that day has not yet arrived.

I’m glad the Texas Supreme Court upheld the State Fair’s firearms ban. If the time comes when people need to carry pistols to the State Fair, then that event should be canceled. Then where would I get my Fletcher's Corny Dog?

Hands off my corny dog, pilgrim.

Zelensky’s victory plan for defeating Russia could get us all killed

Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky visited the United States last week to pitch his victory plan for winning Ukraine’s war with Russia. Zelensky’s schedule was packed. He gave a speech to the United Nations General Assembly, spoke with former President Donald Trump, and met privately with President Joe Biden. 

Yet he still had time to campaign for the Democrats in Pennsylvania. Was the little soldier interfering with our presidential election to benefit Kamala Harris?

Zelinski’s victory plan has two components. First, he wants Ukraine admitted to NATO. Second, he insists that the Western allies allow him to attack the Russian motherland with advanced weapons systems, including long-range missiles acquired from the West.

Russian President Vladimir Putin has said plainly that NATO membership in Ukraine could lead to nuclear war. Putin has also said that Russia might respond with nuclear weapons if Ukraine fires Western-supplied long-range missiles into his country.

I don’t believe President Biden’s handlers are stupid enough to allow Ukraine to fire US-made missiles into the Russian heartland. Their plan is to allow the Ukraine war to drag on for as long as it takes until Russia loses heart and admits defeat.

That plan won’t work. The Russian economy is growing despite Western sanctions, and the Russian army is much bigger now than it was when Russia invaded Ukraine in February 2022.

Meanwhile, the war has been a disaster for Ukraine. Its cities and infrastructure are being pounded into rubble.  More than 6 million Ukrainians have fled the country, and thousands of Ukrainian soldiers have been killed or wounded.

There are only two likely outcomes of the war in Ukraine. First, the West can assure Russia that Ukraine will not join NATO and accede to at least some of Russia’s demands for annexation of Ukrainian territory. At the very least, the West must admit that Crimea is part of Russia.

Alternatively, this war can drag on until one side or the other miscalculates, and the war escalates into a nuclear conflict. If that happens, the baby boomer generation will send its grandchildren to Eastern Europe to fight World War III.

Let us suppose the US is plunged into a nuclear war due to missteps by our nation's bungling diplomats. In that case, the Democratic Party can take comfort in the knowledge that its dream of destroying the American economy, American values, and American culture was finally realized.

It was necessary to destroy Ukraine to save it.

90 second Movie Review: Killer Heat is a Good Contemporary Film Noir

I love film noir movies, especially the black-and-white films made in the 1930s and 1940s that featured cynical private detectives who smoked too much, drank too much, and held cynical views about life in general and women in particular. Humphrey Bogart and Robert Mitchum were masters of film noir, and they wore their slouch fedora hats in a way that made them look both sinister and dissipated.

"Killer Heat" is a worthy addition to the film noir genre. Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays Nick Bali, an ex New York cop whose life was turned upside down by the discovery of his wife’s infidelity. Bali is a Greek American who speaks the Greek language, so he moves to Athens and sets up shop as a private detective who drinks bourbon straight from the bottle.

Bali is hired by Penelope Vardakis (played by the beautiful Shailene Woodley), the sister-in-law of a wealthy man who died under suspicious circumstances. Bali uses effective but slightly dishonest tactics to solve what turns out to be a murder.

I won’t reveal more of the plot other than to say that the story moves quickly and is enhanced by a backstory that explains why Bali is so bitter about his past.

"Killer Heat" may not be great drama, but film noir fans will enjoy it. For one thing, viewers can understand the plot, which is more than can be said for that famous film noire classic, "The Big Sleep." The movie is set in Crete, and the Mediterranean landscape is breathtakingly beautiful. You can find this film on Amazon.

Killer Heat, a film in the classic film noir tradition

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90 Seconds Movie Review: Sisu is a Finnish Rambo Movie. What's Not To Like?

 Everyone loves an adventure movie about a heroic underdog who kills vicious Nazis in creative and unusual ways. I know I do. Nazi killing is the secret of success for the "Indiana Jones" movies, "Inglorious Bastards," and "Fury."

"Sisu," a Nordic movie, is a worthy addition to the Nazi-eradication niche of the Action movie genre. Sisu is a Finnish word roughly translated  as "strength of will, determination, perseverance, and acting rationally in the face of adversity."

The movie is a straightforward tale about a retired Finnish soldier who had served as a sniper in Finland's winter war against the Russians. The hero, Aatami Korpi, played by Jorma Tommila, lives a solitary life mining for gold in the Lapland region of Finland. 

Korpi finds a lot of gold, but unfortunately, he is discovered by Nazi soldiers retreating across Finland in the late stage of World War II. The Nazis steal Korpi's gold and try to kill him, but he thwarts them as the movie unfolds across the tundra. 

By the end of the movie, Korpi has dispatched all his Nazi adversaries and rescues a group of Finnish women whom the Nazis planned to exploit as sex slaves. 

Critics have generally reviewed Sisu favorably and compared it to Sergio Leone's spaghetti westerns and Quinton Tarantino's movies. I would describe the flick as a Finnish Rambo film.

Sisu does not pretend to be a cinematic work of art. However, I found the movie satisfying as I watched it on a lazy autumn afternoon. I recommend viewing it with an ice-cold light beer and a bowl of popcorn. You can find it on Netflix.

No worries: The guy with a knife in his brain is a Nazi.

90 Seconds Food Review: A Dummy’s Guide to Good Texas Barbecue Restaurants

 Most Texans love to eat barbecue, and barbecue restaurants are sprinkled throughout the Lone Star State. How do you choose a good one?

I’ve eaten in dozens of Texas  barbecue  restaurants, and when I’m scoping out a new barbecue joint, I look for three signs

Sign number one. Check out the parking lot. Pickup trucks should outnumber sedans by at least three to one. Most working people in Texas drive pickup trucks, and these folks know their barbecue.

Jim’s Barbecue in Waskom, Texas, is a good example. I’ve often eaten at Jim’s, and pickup trucks always outnumber sedans.

Sign number two. Good Texas barbecue joints usually shun paper napkins in favor of big rolls of paper towels. If you walk into a Texas barbecue restaurant and see industrial rolls of brown paper towels on the tables, you can be sure you’ll eat some good Texas barbecue.

Sign number three. Good Texas barbecue restaurants always offer these three side dishes: baked beans, potato salad, and coleslaw. Texans have never understood the principle of the leafy green vegetable, and you should be suspicious of any barbecue restaurant that offers broccoli, brussels sprouts, or arugula lettuce salads. Too many vegetables is a sign that the restauranteur is conflicted about being in the barbecue business.

Good Texas barbecue restaurants share another common feature. Generally, they serve their customers sweet, iced tea in jumbo-sized plastic glasses— 20 ounces or more. In addition, the server comes by every five minutes and refills the glasses. When you’ve eaten at a good Texas restaurant, you will be satisfied with the food and well-hydrated because you drank two or more quarts of sweet iced tea.

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Image credit: Houston Food Finder

90 seconds Movie Review: Daddio is a stinker

Saturday night in rural Mississippi and nothing to do. Fortunately, my spotty Internet service is working, and I can rent a movie on amazon.com.

I select Daddio, a new Amazon offering starring Sean Penn and Dakota Johnson. I can rent the movie for six bucks. How bad can it be?

Pretty bad as it turned out. First of all, the entire movie is set in a New York City cab. I kept waiting for Sean and Dakota to get out of the cab and do something interesting, but they never did.

Instead, Sean Penn’s character turns out to be a rustic Freudian psychoanalyst posing as a nosy cab driver. Dakota Johnson plays a stunningly beautiful computer programmer living in midtown Manhattan. As the tedious story unfolds, she reveals herself to be a troubled woman scarred by her dysfunctional childhood back in western Oklahoma. Dakota lost her Oklahoma twang but never shook the anguish of growing up without her father.  

Throughout this excruciatingly long movie, Sean probes Dakota’s hidden anguish with his gritty cab driver's intuition. By the end of the movie, Dakota realizes why she is in an abusive relationship with an older married man.

That’s the whole movie. Before renting this sad sack drama, consider that you are only on this earth for a brief period of time. Do you want to waste part of your precious life watching Sean Penn practice psychiatry without a license?