90-Second Food Review: A Dummy's Guide To Tex-Mex Restaurants

I grew up in western Oklahoma, a region unknown for its cuisine. Even as a small child, I longed for spicy food, but the only condiment in my family's kitchen cabinet was Worcestershire sauce.

When I was a little older, I discovered Tex-Mex food. My family began dining at the El Chico restaurant in downtown Oklahoma City. 

I loved that restaurant! I was astounded by the complimentary tortilla chips and salsa—manna from heaven. I always ordered a combination plate with a tamale, an enchilada, and lots of chili gravy.

Unfortunately, El Chico banned us from the restaurant after my father and grandfather got into a loud and acrimonious dispute over who would pay our lunch bill. To this day, a copy of my father's driver's license is taped to the cash register with this warning: 

Precaución. No sirvas a este gringo ni a su familia Fossey. ¡Llámale a la policía!

Since those days, I've eaten in over a hundred Tex-Mex joints, and I consider myself an authority on this ethnic cuisine. Here are some tips to help you find a good Tex-Mex restaurant.

First, a Tex-Mex restaurant's popularity is primarily based on the strength of its margaritas.  If the joint's margaritas contain adequate tequila (fortified perhaps with Everclear), you will give the eatery a five-star review.

How can you determine if the margaritas are sturdy? Order a house margarita on the rocks. When you've finished it, a little voice in your head will tell you to switch to beer.

Ignore that voice, order a second drink,  and chug it down. If the proprietor deprives you of your car keys, you'll know the margaritas are strong enough.

Here are a few other pointers: 

First, Mexican beer is the only beer to drink when eating Mexican food, and it must be ice cold. I favor the obscure brands: Carta Blanca or Victoria. My friends like Corona, but I find it tastes too much like Bud Light.

Second, your server should serve your food on a hot plate. Nothing tastes worse than tepid Mexican food, and a good Tex-Mex restaurant will present you with a searing platter that will give you a second-degree burn if you unwisely touch it.

Finally, Mexican food is inexpensive, and most Tex-Mex restaurants are consistently good. I ate many meals at El Patio restaurant on Guadalupe Street in Austin while working my way through law school in the 1970s. The dinner plate only cost a buck fifty.

Ever since those days, Tex-Mex has been my favorite comfort food. Hot and flavorful, with an orange glow rising from the melted cheese, a Tex-Mex meal signals to me that all's right with the world.

The Enchilada plate at an El Paso restaurant. What's not to like?

A Recipe from Flyover Country: Wild Pig Tenderloin and Honeycrisp Apples

 As I wrote in an earlier blog, my family killed a feral hog at our Mississippi home a while back, and we've been experimenting ever since about how to cook and eat it.

First, a young family member cooked an excellent wild hog and rutabaga stew. If you're wondering what to do with your rutabagas, I suggest you cook them with a feral pig pork shoulder.

More recently, my wife, Kim, selected the tenderloin, a choice cut from our feral hog harvest, and concocted a recipe for wild pig tenderloin and Honeycrisp apples. Here's the recipe:

• Cut the tenderloin into one-inch thick medallions and marinate them in Italian salad dressing or your favorite marinade. 

• Wrap each medallion in a thick slice of bacon, securing the wrap with toothpicks. 

• Sear both sides of the medallions in a hot skillet, using a tablespoon of vegetable oil to keep the meat from sticking. 

• Slice one Honeycrisp apple into wedges and arrange them among the pork medallions. 

• Add two tablespoons of Worcester sauce to the pan and drizzle a small amount of Steen's cane sugar syrup over the medallions and apples. 

• Place the pan in a preheated oven and cook uncovered at 350 degrees for 30 minutes or until the pork's internal temperature is 145 degrees. 

Kim served the tenderloin with baked Louisiana sweet potatoes seasoned with butter and brown sugar. Mustard greens or collard greens would also pair well with the pork.

Our next project: Mesquite Smoke Wild Hog Ribs!

Wild Pig and Honeycrisp Apples: Very Tasty

A woman is burned alive on the NYC subway: "A bad moon on the rise"

Well don't go around tonight . . .

[I]t's bound to take your life

There's a bad moon on the rise.

John C. Fogerty

An illegal alien from Guatemala was arrested a few days ago, accused of killing a sleeping subway rider by setting her on fire. According to witnesses, the attacker sat calmly in the subway car, watching his victim burn--perhaps even fanning the flames.

Plenty of subway riders witnessed the attack, and several people videotaped the horrific assault on their cellphones.  Apparently, no one thought to take off their winter coats and use them to smother the flames.

Perhaps bystanders were thinking of Daniel Penny, who subdued Jordan Neely, an addled homeless man who was terrorizing subway passengers riding the New York subway. Neely died, and Penny was prosecuted for criminal manslaughter. A jury acquitted Penny of the criminal charges, but he's being sued by one of Neely's relatives. 

What did subway riders learn from Penny's travail? In New York City, it's better to do nothing than intervene to protect someone from violence.

Veteran New Yorkers may dismiss this latest tragedy as an isolated event. After all, millions of people ride the NYC subways each week, and only one person has been burned to death. 

Of course, they're right. Nevertheless, I wonder whether city authorities are doing enough to keep New Yorkers safe.

I rode the Paris subways a couple of years ago and was surprised to see that the subway stations had transparent barriers that protected Parisians from falling or being pushed onto the train tracks.

What a good idea! I wonder why New York hasn't installed these safety devices. Wouldn't that be a better financial investment than hosting illegal aliens in luxury hotels?

And wouldn't it be wiser for the New York District Attorney's Office to praise people like Daniel Penny for stepping up to protect others from violence rather than spending public money to put these Good Samaritans in prison?

Of course, I speak from the perspective of a guy who lives in rural Mississippi next to a lake inhabited by alligators and invasive Asian carp. What do I know about life in urban America? 

As Lynyrd Skynyrd put it, I know a little and can guess the rest. The quality of life is deteriorating for average urbanites--the ones who buy their own groceries and don't have chauffeurs and private security guards. 

These folks may laugh at the people living in Flyover Country, dismissing them as "white Christian nationalists." Some urban progressives might go so far as to call rural Americans fascists because they refused to vote for the Democratic presidential candidate.

Urban Americans should consider the possibility that life in Flyover Country may be better than life in the inner cities--even though we don't live within walking distance of MOMA or a good Korean barbecue restaurant.

One thing for certain. If an illegal alien set a woman on fire in Wilkinson County, Mississippi, there would be no bystanders.  Someone would smother the flames with a camouflage hunting jacket, and a passerby with a gun would shoot the son of a bitch who set the blaze.

Photo credit: Associated Press

Congress Passes the Social Security Fairness Act: Will This Reform Force Nancy Pelosi to Cut Back on Foreign Travel?

 Congress adopted the Social Security Fairness Act on Saturday. This legislation eliminates the penalty millions of public employees experience if they belong to a pension plan that does not participate in the Social Security system.

This reform will benefit school teachers in at least 15 states. In Louisiana, for example, school districts don't make Social Security contributions for their employees. Teachers are poorly paid, and many take part-time or summer jobs to supplement their income.

Even though teachers make Social Security contributions on their second jobs, their Social Security benefits are reduced solely because their primary employer is not in the Social Security system. The American Federation of Teachers estimates that 1.2 million school employees are penalized by this unfair exclusion.

This reform legislation will allow these teachers to receive the Social Security benefits they deserve when they reach retirement age and enable them to retire without becoming impoverished. 

The Social Security Fairness Act passed with overwhelming bipartisan support, and the question arises: Why did it take so long?

Fiscal conservatives in Congress fought the legislation because the cost would further strain the already financially strapped Social Security program. Indeed, according to the Congressional Budget Office, this reform will cost an estimated $196 billion over ten years.

So what? President Biden blew through twice as much money when he forgave $180 billion in student loans over his four-year term and spent another $180 billion on the Ukraine war. I don't hear many people squawking about those expenditures.

This is the new reality. Retired Americans living on fixed incomes are being squeezed by inflation. Forty percent of older Americans depend solely on Social Security to fund their retirement, and the average monthly benefit is only about $2,000.

Surely, we can all agree that modestly enhancing Social Security benefits for retired teachers is a good use of public money. If this reform forces the federal government to economize, there will undoubtedly be some wasteful expenditures that can be eliminated.

For example, perhaps it's time to end American support for the Ukraine war and for Nancy Pelosi to cut back on foreign travel in private jets.

Nancy Pelosi in Japan. Did she fly coach?

My deer stand is an all-night restaurant for wild pigs

If you've never been deer hunting, you may think the sport involves creeping around the woods looking for a deer to shoot. After all, that's how Robert Dinero did it in "The Deer Hunter."

Most hunters, however, hunt deer by luring them to a deer feeder that distributes corn and then shooting their prey from a concealed spot called a deer blind.

Battery-operated game cameras placed near the deer feeders aid hunters in their quest. These cameras are activated by movement and linked to the hunter's cell phone. Thus, a deer slayer can know the exact time a deer arrives at the feeder. 

Simple enough, right? 

In real life, however, hunting deer from a blind is much dicier than you might think. First of all, deer are not stupid. They're suspicious when they come across a deer feeder for the first time. They ask themselves, Who was the Good Samaritan who left this delicious corn for me in this woodland clearing? What's the catch? 

Over time, the female deer become less cautious and may visit a deer feeder during daylight hours, usually around dawn. 

Not the bucks—particularly the trophy bucks with magnificent antlers. Their mamas didn't raise no fools. They've lived long enough to grow impressive antlers because they're too bright to approach a deer feeder during daylight hours.

So when do the big fellas show up to munch corn? In the middle of the night when it is illegal to shoot them.

And the bucks often have company when they arrive for their midnight snack. Feral hogs are nocturnal creatures, and they typically appear with their relatives to vacuum up the corn with their ideally fitted flat noses. These scruffy beasts have terrible table manners and never learned to share. Over time, they will drive out the deer.

During my last deer hunt, I contemplated the habits of the wary deer and the cunning wild pig as I shivered in my blind in the pre-dawn darkness. I'm not really hunting deer, I reflected. I'm running an all-night restaurant for feral hogs.

I hope they appreciate my generosity.

Feral Hog and Rutabaga Stew: It Tastes Better Than It Sounds

I wrote a while back that two young family members shot a wild hog at our Mississippi home, a sure sign that I am now living off the grid. 

The menfolk field-dressed the hog on the driveway and disposed of the guts at a top-secret location as a peace offering to the turkey vultures. The next morning, the entire family cut the meat into big chunks and put the harvest in the freezer.

Now what? Can we really eat this porcine trespasser?

My brother-in-law sent me The Hog Book by Jesse Griffiths. This encyclopedic volume is the definitive guide to hunting, killing, butchering, and eating feral pigs. 

In The Hog Book’s opening pages, Griffiths confidently asserts that all wild pigs are edible and some are delicious. 

Can that be true?  How can an animal so ugly and foul-smelling be good to eat? 

However, I have several friends who have killed and eaten feral hogs. They assure me that the small wild piggies are pretty tasty, although large boars should be avoided.

Our family’s chief outdoorsman, Charlie, prepared the family’s first wild pig meal: Feral Hog and Rutabaga Stew. I ate two helpings and pronounced it excellent.

Here’s the recipe:

• Season a pork shoulder with salt, pepper, and Tony Chachere’s seasoning. Brown the meat in a large saucepan with a bit of cooking oil.

• While the meat is browning, cut up an onion, two bell peppers, a large head of celery, and two rutabagas. The rutabagas should be sliced into one-inch cubes.

• Place the cut vegetables in the saucepan with the browned pork shoulder. Add two cups of beef stock. 

• Cover the saucepan with a lid and simmer the meat and vegetables over low heat for three hours or until the pork is tender enough to be pulled into large shreds with a fork.

Why the rutabagas? Unlike potatoes, rutabagas will stay firm through three hours of cooking. Also, rutabagas add a sweet taste to the stew and diminish the gamey taste of wild hog meat.

I have long been intrigued by the idea of shooting and eating a wild pig. After all, there are millions of feral swine in the rural South, and they’re all edible.

When the Apocalypse descends on America, as it indeed will, I'm comforted in the knowledge that I am surrounded by pork chops on the hoof. My family can eat humanely raised, locally sourced, hormone-free, wild-caught meat during lean times, while my ill-prepared urban neighbors will be forced to survive on ramen noodles and freeze-dried tofu.

Donald Trump is not a rapist. But you already knew that.

 ABC and George Stephanopoulos settled Donald Trump's defamation lawsuit for $15 million to be paid as a donation to Trump's future presidential foundation. Stephanopoulos said Trump was found liable in a civil case for raping a woman, which wasn't true. 

In addition to the money settlement, Stephanopoulos and ABC will publish a statement expressing regret for the error and pay $1 million toward Trump's legal fees.

Donald Trump is a nationally known celebrity and political leader, and the U.S. Supreme Court has laid down rigorous restrictions on defamation lawsuits brought by public figures. To prevail on a libel claim, a public figure must prove that the defendant acted maliciously by knowingly publishing a falsehood or with reckless disregard for whether the statement is true.

George Stephanopoulos is not the only person who has labeled Trump as a rapist. That falsehood has repeatedly been alleged on social media and in the legacy press. However, those allegations have probably been scrubbed from the web in light of the ABC settlement.

Responsible journalists who have circulated this falsehood should follow George Stephanopolis's example and publicly admit they regret their error. And perhaps an apology is in order--whether or not it is sincere.

Photo credit: NY Times

Americans aren't healthy: Let's give RFK Jr. a chance as HHS Secretary

 My great-grandfather, Jonah Fossey, emigrated from England with his family in the 1880s. He landed in Halifax and died at the age of 96 in Nickerson, Kansas.

Jonah's son, William James Fossey, moved to Oklahoma Territory as a young man. He established a grocery store in Buffalo, Oklahoma, and a cattle-hauling business and died at 92.

James Fossey, my father, grew up in northern Oklahoma during the Dust Bowl years. He joined the Army Air Corps before Pearl Harbor, was captured by the Japanese, and survived the Bataan Death March. Dad died in a VA hospital in 1999 at the age of 81.

I'm 76 years old, have two stents in my arteries, and suffered a debilitating stroke in 2022. A cyst covers the entire right lobe of my thyroid gland, so the ol' thyroid's got to go. I will be fortunate to live as long as my father and have no chance of living into my 90s as my grandfather and great-grandfather did.

Americans aren't living as long as they did just a few years ago; my family is just one example. The U.S. spends more on healthcare than any other developed country, yet we don't live as long as the Europeans.

Donald Trump nominated Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as Secretary of Health and Human Services. RFK Jr. is fiercely critical of our nation's healthcare system and food industry. Trump haters claim Kennedy is "unhinged." Froma Harrop, a reliable shill for progressive Democrats, recently published an op-ed calling him a weirdo, an idiot, and a fruitcake.

I say let's give RFK Jr. a chance. We are not a healthy nation. One in three American adults is prediabetic, and 40 percent are obese. We gotta do better; we gotta live better.

Speaking of fruitcakes. I ate a lot of fruitcakes as a kid during my family's bleak Christmas celebrations. Is that why a cyst is taking over my thyroid gland?

RFK Jr. Photo credit: Politico.

Why do Ivy Leaguers commit crimes? The sad case of Luigi Mangione

 Luigi Mangione was valedictorian of his class at an exclusive Baltimore prep school and received two engineering degrees from Penn, an Ivy League university. He could look forward to a rich and fulfilling life. Then, he was charged with assassinating an insurance executive in New York City.

Several years ago, Brittany Smith, a Harvard undergraduate, pled guilty to criminal acts in connection with the killing of a drug dealer by her boyfriend, who had been living with her in her Harvard dorm room. Smith received a three-year sentence after pleading guilty to five criminal charges, including lying to a grand jury.

Colinford Mattis graduated from  Princeton University and New York University's law school and had a good job with a New York City law firm. Last year, he was sentenced to one year in jail for firebombing a police car. 

All these young people attended Ivy League universities and had their whole lies before them. Why would they commit crimes?

I can think of three explanations. First, some people who receive degrees from prestigious universities believe they have elevated moral principles that entitle them to commit crimes. What would make Mangione think he was committing a righteous act by allegedly gunning down the father of two children?

Second, some Ivy League criminals may think the rules of civilized behavior don't apply to them due to their heightened social status. Brittany Smith was living with her boyfriend in a Harvard dorm room in violation of Harvard housing rules. Perhaps she thought that her criminal acts would have no consequences.

Finally, I think some people with Ivy League credentials delude themselves that a criminal episode is thrilling and won't affect their career projectories. It was probably fun to throw a firebomb into a police car. What could go wrong?

On average, people who graduate from elite colleges commit fewer crimes than the general population. Most are highly intelligent and acutely aware that their educational advantages behoove them to live by high moral standards.

Nevertheless, we should not assume that everyone who attended an Ivy League school is brilliant with stellar scruples. Some of them, like the rest of us, go astray and throw away all the opportunities that their college degrees afforded them.

Luigi Mangione

More Biden pardons may be coming. Don't be afraid to ask for one.

 Many progressive Democrats recoiled in horror when President Biden pardoned his son Hunter for every crime he might have committed going back to 2014. Old Joe took a lot of heat from the legacy media for breaking his promise not to let Hunter off the hook for his various high jinks, but Whoopie Goldberg of  The View stood by him--which is what's important.

In fact, the Hunter-pardon caper went so well that Biden staffers are thinking about getting the President to issue preemptive pardons to other Biden cronies to protect them from President Trump's vengeance. Biden's people floated the names of three people who might need pardons for the things they did to thwart Trump's agenda: Liz Cheney. Anthony Fauci, and Senator-elect Adam Schiff.

I have two problems with this notion.  First, pardoning someone for misdeeds because they might be vigorously prosecuted reminds me of the proverbial man who killed his parents and then begged the court for mercy because he's an orphan. 

Second, I don't think Biden has the power to pardon people for theoretical crimes for which they haven't been charged or convicted. It is true, for example, that Liz Cheney is an asshole, but that's not a federal crime for which she can be prosecuted.

I don't think Biden will issue preemptive pardons to political figures who haven't been charged with a crime. Doing so would only embarrass the people who receive such pardons, and accepting a blanket pardon would be an implicit admission of criminal wrongdoing.

On the other hand, I believe President Biden will seriously consider pardoning family members who have been credibly accused of profiting from a money laundering and influence-peddling scheme while Joe was serving as Vice President. If proven, these accusations could lead to serious jail time.

However, pardoning the Biden clan for unspecified hypothetical crimes would be risky. Millions of people would wonder why Doctor Jill and Joe's brother James need a pardon, which might prompt honest district attorneys to investigate.

Long Live the Gingerbread People!

 Unless you've been living under a rock, you know that Trader Joe's grocery stores sell all kinds of delectable snack foods. 

Yesterday, I returned from Trader Joe's with a box of gingerbread cookies. The box's cellophane window revealed traditional little gingerbread figures—just like the gingerbread men I devoured as a kid.

As I tore into the contents, I was pleased to see that the box was labeled "Mini Gingerbread People," not "Mini Gingerbread Men." That's good, I thought to myself. Trader Joe's is woke and fully invested in Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion.

However, as I bit into my first cookie,  I was horrified to see that all the little gingerbread figures were covered with white icing. I could discern no Latinex gingerbread people, no BIPOC people, no cookies that represented the LGBTQX community.

Indeed, as I spread the confections on a plate, I realized I was looking at a pile of cleverly disguised cis-gendered, white Christian nationalist cookie men. I spat out this despicable little symbol of racism, sexism, and homophobia. I immediately took my box of gingerbread people back to my local Trader Joe's store and demanded a full refund.

Not surprisingly, the store manager profusely apologized and assured me that all boxes of gingerbread people were being recalled nationwide and would be off Trader Joe's shelves by sundown.

Whew! That was close. Now, I can devote all my time to persuading the municipal road maintenance department to change the name of manholes to person holes, maintenance holes, or inspection chambers.

Racism, misogyny, and homophobia have contaminated America's food supplies.

President Biden pardons Hunter. What about Jill?

 The legacy media, in a frenzy of mendacity and hypocrisy, claims to be disappointed by President Biden's pardon of his son Hunter. After all, old Joe said repeatedly that he wouldn't give his wayward child a get-out-jail-free card.

"We haven't seen a pardon this sweeping as Hunter Biden's in generations," Politico said in a breathless headline. Moreover, Politico pointed out, "The starting date of Jan. 1, 2014, in the Biden pardon was surely not chosen randomly." 

Indeed, the date was undoubtedly chosen to cover Hunter's time on the board of Burisma Holdings. Burisma, you may recall, is the Ukrainian gas company that lavishly paid Hunter while his dad was Vice President.

A New York Times story, in a touching display of naivety, reported that Joe Biden changed his mind about pardoning his crack-sniffing offspring based partly on the fear that President Trump would wreak vengeance on his beloved son. The Times journalists overlooked the far more plausible explanation for Joe Biden's flip-flop-- that our gasbag president was simply lying. 

Other outlets worried that the Hunter pardon would tarnish Joe's presidential legacy, which is laughable. What legacy? 

Joe was cognitively diminished the day he took office. His extravagant spending triggered rampant inflation. His bumbling machinations in Ukraine damn near started a nuclear war with Russia, and his administration's retreat from Afghanistan was a disaster. 

Joe Biden's legacy is simply this: He was a demented grifter who significantly reduced our nation's standing as the leader of the Free World. I'm sure the curators at the Biden Presidential Library will explain all this with instructive dioramas and pre-recorded lectures.

I predict that Joe Biden isn't through issuing pardons. Several friends and family members have been credibly accused of participating in an influence-peddling and money-laundering scheme. Surely, he will pardon Dr. Jill and his brother James.

When Biden issues more pardons to his cronies, his media fans will be further dismayed.  However, the legacy media will melt down into apoplectic rage when President Trump pardons all the January 6th protesters, which Trump has promised to do. 

That day is coming. When those pardons are issued, I'll enjoy reading what the New York Times, the Washington Post, and Politico will say about Trump's merciful gesture--not to mention the wizened sages on The View.

The Times is shocked, shocked, about the Hunter pardon.
Photo credit: Judicial Watch and Politico

Moving the Nation's Capital Out of the District of Columbia. An Idea Whose Time Has Come?

People's Republic, Kurt Schlichter's post-apocalyptic novel, posits a breakdown of the American Republic as the Blue States collapse under the weight of woke politics and break off into a separate country.

 Schlichter labels the new nation-state the People's Republic of North America, which he envisions as being georaphically divided. The western segment is comprised of California, Oregon, and Washington. The eastern portion encompasses the East Coast states stretching from Maine to northern Virginia and the Rust Belt states of the upper Midwest.

Sandwiched between these breakaway regions, the old United States of America is now reduced to the Southern states, the Plains states, and the Rocky Mountains West. The new capital city is Dallas.

I thought about Schlichter's novel as I pondered President Trump's proposal to close the FBI headquarters in Washington, D.C., and move the agents out into the real world, where they could revive the FBI's original mission of arresting the bad guys.

Why the hell not? It makes sense to separate our nation's premier law enforcement agency from the bureaucratic morass in the District of Columbia, where the FBI morphed itself from a crime-fighting agency into stormtroopers for the Democratic Party.

Nevertheless, the FBI will need a new headquarters. I suggest Dallas as the location of the new FBI central office. 

Dallas is a sober, common-sense city where citizens are discouraged from defecating on the sidewalks. Unlike Minneapolis, where disgruntled dwellers are free to burn the town down, or Los Angeles, where shoplifting has become a competitive sport with varsity and JV divisions, most Dallasites obey the law. Doesn't it make sense for the FBI headquarters to be in a law-abiding town?

Indeed, Trump should pursue a broader vision than simply relocating the FBI. Why not move the entire capital from the District of Columbia to a new location as yet unsullied by corruption, incompetence, and venality? 

Let's move all the federal bureaucrats to a new capital in Dallas, Omaha, Pocatello, Bakersfield, or perhaps Fargo, North Dakota. 

Such a move would force our bigoted and provincial coastal elites to stop referring to America's Heartland as Flyover Country. More importantly, it would give the denizens of the Deep State an opportunity to fumigate the pesthole on the Potomac where our nation's capital now resides.

Land Mines, Cluster Bombs, and a Partridge in a Pear Tree. All I Want For Christmas is No World War III

Insanity, a sage once said,  "is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result."

Under that definition, President Biden's Ukraine war strategy is insane. This war has dragged on for almost three years, and the carnage only intensifies.

 Ukrainian president Zelensky periodically asks Biden for more sophisticated weapons; Biden hesitates briefly and then gives Zelensky whatever the little guy wants.

Biden has become a short-order cook for the Ukrainians. Abrams tanks, F-16s, cluster bombs, long-range missiles, and land mines: "Coming right up!"

Biden apparently believes that Russian casualties will eventually force Russian President Vladimir Putin to sue for peace. Indeed, the pile of dead and wounded grows bigger by the day. 

Nevertheless, American weapons and technology haven't hastened an end to the war. In fact, the scope of the war is expanding. North Korean troops are fighting alongside the Russians in the Kursk region. China buys Russian oil to finance Putin's war and may have committed acts of sabotage on behalf of Russia in the Baltic Sea. Iran supplies Russia with drones. 

America and Great Britain have given Zelensky everything he asks for, including permission to fire US and British-made long-range missiles into Russia. President Biden will soon be sending ant-personnel mines to the Zelensky regime--an additional escalation.

In short, the US and its allies are doing the same thing over and over by supplying Ukraine with evermore lethal weaponry, and they keep getting the same result--an increasingly aggressive Russian assault. 

Jamie Dimon, Chase CEO, is correct: World War III has already started. President Trump has promised to bring the Ukraine war to a swift conclusion. Let's hope and pray that Biden doesn't drag our nation into a global nuclear conflict before Trump is sworn into office.

How I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb.

Will Biden start World War Three? Or Has It Already Begun?

To be fair, Oprah Winfrey warned us. If Kamala Harris loses the presidential election, she said, "it is entirely possible that we will not have the opportunity to ever cast a ballot again."

Like millions of Americans, I misinterpreted Oprah's dire prediction. I thought she was saying that if Trump is elected President, he will destroy American democracy.

Now, I think Oprah may have been warning us that if the Democrats lose to Trump, President Biden will start World War III.

That certainly looks like what Biden is trying to do by unleashing the Ukrainians to fire American-made long-range missiles into Russia. President Vladimir Putin has repeatedly warned that he might launch a nuclear response if Ukraine attacks the Russian Motherland with US or NATO missiles.

Indeed, Jamie Dimon, CEO of Chase Bank, said last month that "World War III has already begun."

Dimon pointed out that we "already have battles on the ground being coordinated in multiple countries." The North Koreans have joined Russia in fighting Ukraine, and Iran is making drones for the Russians. It seems increasingly likely that Belarus will get sucked into the maelstrom of global war.

What the hell are we doing? Why isn't Vice President Kamala Harris invoking the 25th Amendment to wrest control of the government from Biden, who is in severe cognitive decline? Why hasn't Congress begun impeachment proceedings to stop Biden from escalating the Ukrainian conflict?

It's time to take old Joe's car keys and return him to Delaware. And let's find out who in our government goaded Biden into stupidly escalating this senseless war. Those individuals need to be sent back to Martha's Vineyard.

World War III may be coming to your neighborhood
Photo credit: NY Times

Biden Okays Long-Range Missile Strikes Into Russia. It's Time to Invoke the 25th Amendment

 Russia's war with Ukraine has slogged along for more than a thousand days--longer than the Nazi siege of Leningrad during World War II.  Russia suffered approximately 1.5 million casualties during the Leningrad battle, including about a million people who died of starvation. 

How many people have died so far in the Ukraine war? No one can say for sure because everyone is lying, but a fair estimate is one million dead or wounded. In addition,  the war has displaced about one-third of Ukraine's civilian population.

This is Joe Biden's war; he has sent enough weapons and ammunition to keep it crackling merrily for nearly three years. Ukraine's President Zelensky—the little guy who wears pajamas when he speaks before Congress—claims his country can defeat the Russians if the U.S. supplies it with high-tech weapons, and Biden has obliged.

So far, our government has given Zelensky Abrams tanks, Bradley Fighting Vehicles, cluster bombs, Uranium-tip missiles, Javelin missile systems, and F-16 fighter jets. 

Yet the Russians keep pushing, and North Korea recently joined the fight.

 Everyone knows the Ukrainians can't defeat Russia and that peace can only be achieved through territorial concessions. Does anyone believe the Zelensky regime will reclaim Crimea or the Donbas?

Now Biden's demented days are numbered. Donald Trump will take office in January, and he has promised to bring the Ukraine war to an end. 

So, what does Biden do during the waning days of his administration? He gives Ukraine permission to strike Russia with US-made long-range missiles. 

Vladimir Putin has warned that this escalation could trigger a nuclear war, but apparently, no one in the Biden administration believes him.

In my view, Biden's decision to allow Ukraine to launch long-range American missiles into Russia is insane. The doddering fool only has about 60 more days in office. That's plenty of time to impeach him or invoke the 25th Amendment.

Photo credit: The Economist

Unemployed Lawfaw Attorneys To Staff New Alaska Law School. Letitia James to be VP for DEI?

Paul Krugman, Nobel Prize-winning economist, warned that Donald Trump's victory over Kamala Harris could trigger "economic chaos."

In particular, Trump's election severely shocked the legal industry as hundreds of Lawfare attorneys lost their jobs. Speaking anonymously because of the topic's sensitivity,  one economist estimates that Lawfare generated a substantial percentage of the nation's GNP last year because thousands of Ivy League attorneys were suing or prosecuting Donald Trump.

 "Donald Trump's election throws all those lawyers out of work," the economist apprised. "Also, high-end restaurants in New York and Washington DC will likely lose a quarter of their business."

 Jack Smith, who was prosecuting Trump in the District of Columbia, will probably quit before Trump fires him. The House Judiciary Committee accused Alvin Bragg of violating Trump's constitutional rights. Marc Elias, an expert in political campaign law, is reportedly devastated by the election outcome. Friends say Elias may be forced to euthanize Bode, his Portuguese Water Dog because Elias can no longer afford to feed his beloved pet.

Fortunately, Trump appointed me to his Executive Transition Team and charged me with designing a plan to minimize the economic disruption to the Lawfare industry. Here's my proposal.

Early next year, the federal government will create a new law school in Alaska, the only state without one. The new school will be located on the lovely Aleutian island of Adak, about 4500 miles from the nation's capital.

Out-of-work Lawfare lawyers will find the Adak climate agreeable.  The island seldom experiences freezing weather, and summer temperatures range as high as 51 degrees Fahrenheit in August.

In addition, Adak has a good transportation infrastructure. It offers once-a-week air service to the nearby island of Shemya and connecting flights to Vladivostok.

I will offer all unemployed Lawfare attorneys a tenured professor's position at the Adak School of Law. I've already contacted Jack Smith and offered him the Dean's position. I'm hoping Letitia James will agree to be the Vice President for Diversity, Equity and Bullshit Litigation. 

Under my proposed plan, I'll advise Trump to grant amnesty to every Lawfare lawyer who agrees to join the faculty at the Adak Law School. As for the attorneys who refuse, I think Trump should report them to the various bar associations for abusing the justice system to further political agendas.

The proposed site for  Adak Law School

Post-Election Violence in Baton Rouge? Should You Buy a Shotgun and a Case of Spam?

I received a message on my Nextdoor app inquiring about the possibility of post-election violence in Baton Rouge. "Does anyone know if there are safety precautions in place in case of a riot after the election?" the writer asked. "I don't anticipate a riot, but I keep hearing things that 'may' happen."

The writer's post indicated she (or he) lived in the Riverbend neighborhood, an affluent suburb located near LSU in the Mississippi River floodplain. I can't image election-triggered violence in Riverbend's quiet, leafy streets, and I initially thought the messenger intended to be humorous.

I was tempted to respond that the writer should drive to Academy Sporting Goods without delay and purchase a home-defense shotgun and 200 rounds of buckshot. Then, I would continue, she should make her way to Costco and buy a case of Spam, a fire extinguisher, and at least four bottles of Makers Mark whisky—enough alcohol to make it through a couple of weeks of arson and rioting.

On reflection, however, I concluded that the messager was serious; she really wanted to know if municipal authorities were taking precautions in case Baton Rouge is engulfed by post-election rage.

So, here is my serious response. Baton Rouge has experienced some tense times recently with remarkable calm and civic dignity. The George Floyd killing sparked large-scale riots in several American cities, but not in Baton Rouge. The city's mayor and police chief responded calmly and sympathetically to race-charged events, and no one rioted.

Baton Rouge residents have legitimate things to worry about. The skyrocketing cost of property insurance may soon force people on fixed incomes out of their homes—particularly in flood-prone neighborhoods. Coastal erosion and environmental hazards are ongoing problems that Louisianians can't seem to solve, and our educational system has flaws everyone recognizes.

However, Baton Rouge residents will not riot due to the outcome of the presidential election. After all, this is a city of decent people with proper regard for law and order, for which we should all be grateful.

Not in Baton Rouge

Trump and Kamala Are Afflicted by Severe Communication Disorders

Our nation's presidential election is only a few days away, and Americans have concluded that both presidential candidates are afflicted with severe communication disorders. I'm not talking about foot-in-mouth disease. I'm talking about a profound inability to speak clearly.

Kamala Harris can't elucidate a clear, declarative sentence. She can't do it. Thus, she relies on teleprompters to give the deceptive impression that she knows what the hell she's talking about.

Her communication disorder is compounded by her compulsive urge to cackle when a reporter asks her a difficult question.

Trump speaks too long at public gatherings, tells bombastic tall tales, and gratuitously insults his political enemies if he thinks he can get a laugh.

Let's discuss Kamala first. She's actually bilingual.

Her mother tongue is woke-speak, a language that emerged from academia, where thousands of professors spend their lives conversing in an intentionally meaningless dialect. She also speaks standard English at a primitive level. She can make a bartender understand that she wants a glass of chardonnay, but she can't discuss foreign policy without lapsing into woke-speech.

Trump's disorder involves a disturbing tendency to express himself so poorly that the left-wing press can maliciously interpret his speech as racist, fascist, or even Hitlerian.

For instance, Trump intended for his astonishingly inappropriate criticism of Liz Cheney to make the reasonable observation that militaristic public leaders promote war because they themselves are not in harm's way. Unfortunately, he expressed himself in such a way that his adversaries claimed he was calling for Cheney's assassination.

Here's my take on the two candidates' linguistic disorders. Kamala speaks the way she does because she's unintelligent and has bullshitted her way through life, speaking gibberish (word salads). 

Trump's inability to speak succinctly, civilly, and prudently confounds me. I can't understand why he doesn't choose his words in such a way so as not to invite his enemies to take cheap shots at him.

If Kamala loses the election, I predict she will become president of Harvard University, where everybody converses in woke-speech and no one feels obligated to do useful work.

If Trump loses, he'll have to go into exile if the Supreme Court doesn't shut down the lawfare litigation against him. Ivy League attorneys, like Javert, the fanatical police inspector in Les Miserables, will not rest until they put Mr. Trump in prison. 

This malicious prosecution can only end in two ways. Trump will go to jail, or the lawyers who persecute him will be disbarred for abusing the law.

Me no speakee English

Mamas, Don't Let Your Cowboys Grow Up to be Babies: Willie Nelson Performs at a Kamala Harris Rally

 Kamala Harris held a rally in Houston over the weekend. Someone in the Harris camp promised an appearance by Beyonce, and thousands of Beyonce fans showed up in anticipation of a musical performance.

Beyonce did indeed appear briefly, but she didn't sing. Instead, the crowd heard Willie Nelson, the legendary country singer. Same difference, right?

Apparently not. Feeling victimized by a bait-and-switch, thousands of rally attendees booed Kamala when she appeared on stage to diffuse her politics of joy.

I love Willie Nelson. I am the last living fan to have attended his first 4th of July music festival in Dripping Springs, Texas, in 1973. I wore the grooves off my antique vinyl record of "The Red Headed Stranger" album. 

I sympathize with the Kamala supporters who were angered by the Beyonce debacle. If I had shown up to attend a Kamala rally expecting to hear Willie Nelson's golden voice, I would have been miffed to be treated to Beyonce instead. 

Nevertheless, what makes Kamala Harris think she can win votes by snagging celebrity endorsements? Who gives a shit about George Clooney's political stance, or an endorsement by Beyonce, Bruce Springsteen, or Julia Roberts? 

I'm casting my presidential vote based on global events. Which presidential candidate will help bring the Ukraine war to a close so my grandkids don't get drafted to fight in Eastern Europe? Which candidate will honor our nation's commitment to guarantee Israel's right to exist?

In these volatile times, when the world is on fire, Americans who cast their vote for Kamala Harris because a celebrity endorsed her are behaving like infants.

Let's grow up to be babies. Photo credit: Amazon.com

Wild Pigs Divert My Attention from LSU's Disastrous Loss to Texas A&M

It’s Saturday evening at Lake Mary, Mississippi, and my family has congregated around our big-screen TV to watch LSU play Texas A&M in College Station. It’s a big game: LSU is ranked Number 8 in the national polls, and the Aggies are rated Number 14. Neither team has lost a Southeast Conference game.

I am filled with a sense of well-being. Loved ones are gathered around me. Cold beer is in the refrigerator, and we have plenty of game-time snacks. I adjust my Lazy Boy recliner to a comfortable semi-prone position.

All goes well in the first half, and LSU shows good prospects of beating the insufferable Aggies. Then, my team falls apart. Three interceptions and three missed field goals attest to a Tiger meltdown. I prepare myself for a major case of the weekend blues. We’re running out of beer.

Then providence intervenes. The game camera affixed to a pecan tree alerts us to two feral hogs rooting about in our three-acre front yard. All distress about the ballgame vanishes, and two family members break out their rifles from our gun safe. Armed with a 30.06 and a 30-30, they creep down to my home’s ground level and start shooting.

Both pigs squeal and head for the brush. The smaller hog is mortally wounded but manages to travel about 50 yards before succumbing to her wounds. Two generations of family members with flashlights follow the blood trail and find the interloper. She is stone dead.

What to do with a dead feral hog? Family members truss it up to one of the steel girders that keep our living quarters above the annual spring flood waters. Then they field dress the pig, dividing it into hams, ribs, pork shoulders, and backstrap. 

The hog slayers ice down the meat in a large ice chest and call it a night. We learn that LSU lost to A &M by a score of 38-23, but nobody cares.

The next morning, I propose we take all the hog meat to a nearby game processing plant and turn it into pork chops, sausage, and dinner-size pork loins. I offer to foot the bill.

We vote, and everyone except me opts to process the hog on our kitchen counter. By two in the afternoon, our feral hog is parceled and tucked away in the freezer--about a hundred pounds of meat.

Feral hogs are a major nuisance in the rural South, where they tear up the landscape and destroy crops. People are allowed to hunt them year-around by day or night. 

Everyone I know who has eaten wild-pig meat tells me that the small porkers are delicious. Thus, I ended my weekend feeling good about my family's contribution to feral hog control. And I'm looking forward to eating a pig harvested in my own front yard.

Who cares who won the LSU-Texas A&M game?